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According to the United Nations Commission on Human Rights, there were 100 million people classified as homeless. That figure was in 2005, with males comprising the majority. About 1.8 individuals day per second, 106.6 every minute, nearly 6400 each hour, roughly 153K per day, nearly 4.7M each month and 56M within a 12-month span. Ouch.

The annual budget deficit for 2013/2014 in the UK was £105Bn, or $165B in US currency. For fiscal year 2015 in the US, the estimated budget deficit is $564 billion.

As you can see, this world has a number of issues. However, for some individuals, the racial identity of my wife is far more pressing.

I hear this question so often, I wonder if the world has truly come as far as we would like to believe, when the discussion involves race relations.

However, the topic does not make me upset…not-at-all. Instead, I usually have a perplexing look when the question comes from an antagonistic perspective.

It is one thing to say…

Wow, so your wife is (Blank), how did that introduction occur?

 It is another to say…

(Makes a horrible facial expression of disdain) So, why do you hate Black women?

My brother wants me to address a few things regarding internal and external relations regarding race, and one of the first areas that I want to explore is my interracial relationship. I am sure this will carry over into multiple posts, so I hope you will accompany me on this ride.

Before I dive in, if you are someone with bigoted views towards interracial relationships, Black people, White people, Asians, etc…you are free to continue reading. You can criticize me as you so choose.

However, if you for a second think you can make negative comments based solely on race (LoL), oh goodness…I have a way of engaging with people without using any profanity or shouting loudly.

I actually take pleasure, in conversing with people who think little of others and me. I see it as a mental exercise of sorts.

Concisely, if you are coming to insult, please do so critically. However, if you write silly things composed entirely of your feelings, I will not engage.

But I digress.

What are some of the main questions or statements they bring up, when it involves my relationship’s interracial status?

1Why could you not find a Black woman?

2Are you with her because you cannot handle a strong Black woman?

3Isn’t your mother Black? Are you not ashamed of yourself?

4Weak Black men like you, want a woman they can walk all over.

5You f***ing sellout

6What’s wrong with Black women?

7Do you even find Black women attractive?

There are a number of others of course, but these will do.

With each of these questions and statements, do you know what the common denominator is?


Whenever strangers bring up these topics regarding my relationship, their reaction comes entirely from an emotional realm. Quite fine of course, but race is what I consider a serious topic.

Having your feelings present in the conversation is completely fine. However, you should not allow the feelings to lead the conversation, because as you can see, it clouds your judgment.

I will address each point accordingly, and hopefully, if the types of people who bring up these topics are reading this post, it will give them a different perspective.

Why could you not find a Black woman?

Here is the thing, you are meeting me for the first time, and therefore, you know absolutely nothing about my dating history. How did you conclude that because of my wife, I did not find a Black woman in the past? Remember, this is your first encounter with me.

The fact that you connected her being my wife, with me not finding a Black woman is utterly illogical. One does not mean the other. In other words, this is not X + Y =.

Regardless of the stereotypes, which you have about Black males and non-Black women—it has not-a-thing-to-do-with-me.

Are you with her because you cannot handle a strong Black woman?

This question is one of my favorites, because it never made sense to me. What is a strong Black woman? Is she able to leg-press 700lbs? Can she push a bus with only her body weight? Instead, what I think you mean is mental fortitude.

In other words, a woman with the will to persevere in the face of challenges. Are you saying only Black women are capable?

My wife is somehow mentally weak, because she is not Black. Do you think when she encounters challenges; she simply folds under pressure because she is not a Black woman?

You see, from the women that I encounter, they are not referring to mental fortitude, because there is no way you can make me believe that a woman must be Black, to possess perseverance. This is once again illogical.

Isn’t your mother Black? Are you not ashamed of yourself?

Sigh. Why should the racial makeup of my mother, relate to the racial makeup of the woman I have sex with? Do you see how disgusting the question sounds, when you look at it from that angle?

By your logic, Black males are supposed to have romantic relationships, with women sharing a similar racial identity with their mothers. Okay, let us go to class for a second.